Improving Intimacy Through Fun Kink and Shadow Work
The Healing the Intimate Shadows workshops are the evolution and a new development in IWC’s work, drawn from Phoenix and Robin’s individual backgrounds in areas such as kink, tantra and sexuality. We are all intrigued by the idea of intimate shadows and uncovering those barriers to connection, intimacy and embodied sensuality and sexuality. For many reasons– personal, cultural, and relational– we often lack the tools to safely express our sensual desires and shadows. The Intimate Shadows retreats help empower you to reclaim your erotic self.
During these retreats, you will have the opportunity to explore the following areas:
Intimacy, Vulnerability & Connection
Deep intimacy and connection are human needs. There are many barriers to intimacy and we live in a culture that does not allow vulnerability or punishes its expression. In our modern and fast-paced lives, it’s hard to be present with other people, let alone ourselves. For this reason, it leaves our relationships feeling shallow and unfulfilling. Yet we sense what is possible and crave more, richer relationships.
What would it be like to be truly intimate with another human, to witness and be witnessed, to experience depths of connection beyond the ordinary? There is healing in being truly seen and felt by others and in witnessing.
Kink
Many of us are curious about kink and kink practices. Kink refers to non-conventional sensual or sexual practices, concepts or fantasies. It can take many forms and doesn’t need to be the hard-edged kink popularised on television or in the movies. It doesn’t even need to be about sex.
Good kink practice relies on three things: consent, communication and boundaries. These three elements are lacking in many of our relationships so using kink in a conscious way can be conducive to healing. It is also fun and a way to express the parts of our personality that don’t often see the light of day and to explore sensuality and sexuality in ways that don’t just mean sex. Kink can also be a safe and effective way to explore power dynamics. When we have experiences of being disempowered in life or by experience, there is liberation in being able to play with our own power.
Shadow work & projection
Our shadows are the unclaimed parts of ourselves that we disown or deny, both good and bad. They are the parts we don’t admit, the parts we hide from ourselves and others. There is great healing power in bringing our shadows into the light in a safely, held way. Bringing our shadows into light allows us to reclaim parts of ourselves that do not get expressed, to own our being in new and deeper ways and to bring more of ourselves into the world.
When we don’t own our shadows we project them onto others. We blame others for our own shortcomings and esteem people for the things we feel are lacking in ourselves. All of this is called projection and projection is a barrier to intimacy, to be real with other. Owning our shadows allows us to withdraw our projections from others and to see them, and ourselves, for who we truly are.
“One does not become enlightened by imagining figures of light, but by making the darkness conscious.”- Carl Jung
During these retreats, you will have the opportunity to
- Letting yourself enjoy the darkness and shadows that are part of every connection and relationship
- Develop fluency in Consent/Boundaries
- Design Intentional Space
- Expeirence healing & awareness processes and be supported with unresolved intimacy issues
- Heal Cultural Shame/Guilt
- Receive an introduction to Trauma Awareness
- Ground in Practical Skills & Safety
- Increase Confidence through Grounded Experience
What others have said about these retreats:
“I did the healing the intimate shadows workshop with Phoenix and Robin. I got a lot out of it including learning about communication and boundaries in relationships. I liked how the workshop was very experiential so we could practise everything we learned. Some parts of the workshop were also a bit out of my comfort zone which is where the real growth happened and I could feel myself getting closer to my authentic self. Phoenix and Robin were highly skilled, and compassionate and also knew when to challenge me. I would highly recommend them.”
“Thank you for the wonderful workshop. The progression through the day was smooth and each exercise had its own purpose and lessons. It was great also to be able to provide feedback after each, in pairs and as a group. The honesty, while sometimes confronting, was essential and always heartfelt. It was amazing to see the room being filled with positive vibes through the day and everyone opening to themselves and others.”
“The greatest benefit was in reclaiming shadow parts of self such as desires I’d been ashamed to own or experience. It was juicy, revealing, confronting and challenging. I learn about myself at a much more accelerated rate through erotic work than I can in counselling or in self-development workshops.”
“The main benefit has been integrating all the parts of me into my manifest self expression. About union. Inner unity. Being able to fully explore depths and darkness makes space for me to taste my raw self.”
“I experienced a deep curiosity, as though some ancient part of me knew this practice and wanted to taste it again. In retrospect I was hunting for my edges, yearning for a way to express my sexuality/sensuality with intention. I had always wanted to feel into the darkness surrounding my desires, to be completely seen within a sacred space.”
“I am now far less afraid of emotions such as awkwardness and guilt after being free to sit with them and have them witnessed without judgment. I’m more confident in interacting with my environment. I love myself more.”
“One huge benefit was developing clearer boundaries with others in my life through being able to speak up for what I wanted or didn’t want. Also I found a diminishment of erotic ‘shame’ or embarrassment especially when it comes to asking for what I want, and appreciation of being alive in a woman’s body and the joy that can bring.”
” I’ve come back into my power, loving myself and my body once more.”